Been a Long Time....

Well, it's been quite awhile since I've updated this blog of mine. Little Man is now OVER 18 months old....Think I will do a 19 month letter, because, well, I'll just be different (and I totally missed the 18 month mark)! So it is coming...in just a little over a week. Cannot even believe it.

But today - I just had to write about how God is knocking my socks off. I have been participating in my first "official" Beth Moore Bible study with some fabulous women at my church. It is called "Stepping Up" and has been a study on the Psalms of Ascent. Check it out because it is amazing.

But I had to write about today in particular. Because God spoke to me today in a way I have never heard Him speak to me before. I felt like today's lesson was tailor made for ME.

This coming weekend is my 10 year college reunion. I am excited about it. I am looking forward to seeing my friends and catching up with some folks I haven't seen in a long time. But this weekend also brings a bit of tension, for lack of better word. I will be seeing my ex and his wife for the first time in about 7 or 8 years. My senior year of college wasn't my stellar year....It doesn't rank up there in my best memories. There was a lot of hurt, a lot of questioning, a lot of disappointment. No need to go into all the details. Suffice it to say my heart was broken by two people I cared for deeply, and I will be face to face with those people this weekend for the first time in a long time.

I struggled naming what I was feeling about this weekend. I am certainly way over what happened 10 years ago. I am married to an incredible man who loves me more than I deserve. I have a precious son who is the light of my life. I have grown and matured in ways I cannot explain. I am in a GOOD place. So, why was I so anxious about the upcoming weekend and seeing these two people who used to be such a huge part of my life?? It wasn't hurt, it wasn't fear, it wasn't resentment..... And it finally came to me.... My anxiety was simply stemming from the fact that I was putting my focus on something other than GOD. I was putting my focus on my "place in life," my weight, my insecurities.

God spoke to me this morning through my best friend Jen and Beth Moore. Jen reminded me that it isn't my weight that matters. It isn't about my looks - it is about my spirit. And Beth - well, she reminded me that my road that got me to where I am included my senior year of college for a very specific and God ordained reason. PRAISE THE LORD! I know it sounds elementary. I know it doesn't sound like a huge lightning bolt. But what I realized was that I shouldn't be anxious - I should be grateful. What an amazing journey I have had to lead me to this point 10 years later. What a blessing those tears bestowed on my life. I am where God knew I would be 10 years down the road, and it is good. It is very, very good.

And my life isn't about what anyone else thinks. My life is about my Savior...and my Savior isn't my husband, my child, my friends...... My Savior is Jesus and my life is about bringing glory to HIM. Who cares what I look like? Who cares what I've been through? Who cares about the "stuff" of life? What matters is that I do everything for His glory. Right now, my calling is to be a mom, a wife, and a photographer that seeks to bring Him glory in every interaction I have. And you know what?? One of those interactions is going to happen this weekend, and I am praying fervently that it will GLORIFY Him and that I will be faithful in my current situation.

So, I know that is a bit of a ramble for a first post in a long time. But I'm hoping to come here more often...to take some more time to reflect and share on here. So I guess this was a good place to start!!!

Next time it will be a bit lighter, and will have a picture of my cute little man included!!!

1 Year....

Happy Birthday Baby Boy!

Wow, how is it even possible that you are a year old?? It seems like yesterday that I was holding you in my arms for the first time. What an amazing year it has been. Life with you is more than I could have ever hoped for.

We have had such a fun, full month! We took our first trip to the beach. You got sick while we were there. The doctor said you had the chicken pox, but they were wrong! Turns out you are allergic to penicillin! We were so scared that you would have the chicken pox for your first birthday, but you were just fine by your big day! You loved the beach. You tried to eat the sand, you played with your cousin, and you absolutely adored the big swimming pool! You got all kinds of attention and you ate up every second of it. We can't wait to take you back again.

We started Kindermusik up again this month, and it is quite different than last time around. You are all over the place. It is very hard for you to sit in one place - so we spend a lot of time playing a game of chase around the room. But you absolutely love the music, and you dance and smile the whole time.

You are not showing a whole lot of interest in walking. You will try to stand up on your own, but then you realize you are doing it and sit back down. You love to push your truck around, and one day I think you are just going to let go and take off! You are quite tentative in the walking department, but that's ok! You say "uh-oh" all the time, and you have also started saying "mama," "dada," and "ball." I think I even heard "dog" and "duck" but you haven't been too consistent with those! You sign "all done" and you are working on "more" and "please."

You're still taking 2 naps a day. You are just like your mommy - you love your sleep! You sleep about 12-13 hours at night, and around 3-4 hours during the day. I guess you are just a growing boy who needs your rest!!!

Your birthday was such a very special celebration. Your actual birthday was on Wednesday. We went to lunch with your friends Owen, Carter, and Ansley (and their mommies). That night, Gigi, Pop. Doodle, and Grandaddy all came over for dinner and to have cake and open gifts. You weren't too sure about your cupcake, but you eventually gave in and got some icing on your face! You loved opening your presents and we played and played until way past your bedtime! On Saturday, we had lots of friends over for a special first birthday party and it was so much fun!!! It rained for the first few minutes, but then the sun came out and it was a beautiful evening. You had a great time, and you really dug into your cake that time.

It has been so fun to watch you grow up over this past year. It amazes me that you have turned into this little person with a personality, and an attitude too! You are such a sweet baby, and you are rarely fussy. You have always been that way. You bring so much joy into our lives.

We are forever grateful to God for allowing us to borrow you and be your mommy and daddy.

We love you so much!!!
Happy Birthday, Baby Drew!

Mommy

11 Months

Dear Drew,

How is it possible that another month has gone by, and that next month we will be celebrating your first birthday?? Everyone told me that it goes by too fast - now I believe them. You are certainly not a "baby" anymore....You are growing up and turning into this little person right in front of my very eyes.

You are developing such a personality.... When we are out and about, you have to take it all in. You don't crack a smile too easiliy for strangers, and you are pretty quiet. But when we get home or around people you know, you really let loose and smile, talk, and giggle. You are into ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING. You are most certainly on the move these days. Your little legs take you very quickly where you want to go. You haven't attempted walking yet, but you are cruising around on all of the furniture and have stood on your own a few times - until you realized you were doing it and promptly fell down!

You have 6 teeth now and eat just about anything I put in front of you. You got over your "people food strike" and now you want nothing to do with baby food, which suits us just fine. Your favorite things are anything involving cheese - such your daddy's boy! I need to buy stock in Kraft so I can keep enough cheese in stock in the house.

You rarely snuggle anymore, but when you do, I relish every moment. Most nights you will snuggle with me after your bottle and I love that time with you. You are now saying "Mama" and it thrills me beyond belief. You love to play peek-a-boo and get a big kick out of yourself for doing it.

Your 11th month will be full of many exciting things - a beach trip, starting back in Kindermusik, meeting some of your cousins for the first time, and a BIRTHDAY PARTY!!! I can't believe it.

Every day I am amazed at how blessed I am to be your mommy. I can't imagine my life without you, and most of the time I don't remember a time that you weren't part of my life. I think that is because I loved you before you were ever a twinkle in my eye.... You are such a joy to your daddy and me. We LOVE being your parents.

Happy 11 Month Birthday sweet baby boy!!!

I love you!

Mommy

10 Months

Dear Drew,

My baby Drew isn't so much of a baby anymore! I can't believe what a big boy you are becoming. We have had a fun month and you are definitely keeping your mommy and daddy on our toes.

You are pulling up on everything and crawling everywhere. You have just started cruising around a little bit on the furniture. You uttered your first "mama" the other day - at the same time that you got your first knot on your little head! You ran into the corner of a door and boy did you cry! And then said "ma-ma-ma-ma" as your stretched your little arms out for me. I'm sure that is only the first of MANY bumps on the head.

You are really starting to like big boy food - peas, green beans, chicken, cheese. You will not pretty much try anything we put in front of you. Quite a change from even last week when you wouldn't have anything to do with any finger foods other than puffs! We went to Piggy's for the first time and you loved the ice cream. We also have discovered that you like cake when you pretty much planted your face in my piece the other day!

You had a very busy 4th of July. We went to a birthday party, the church picnic, and our neighborhood picnic. You slept blissfully through the many fireworks that were being set off right outside your window. I'm not sure how you managed that!!!

It is fascinating to watch you grow and learn. You are full of curiousity and wonder - and I love every minute of it. I can hardly believe that in two short months you will be a year old.

You are such a blessing to me!!!
I love you!
Mommy

Powerful Word for the Day....

I was in the car today on the way to go grocery shopping. I was listening to our local Christian radio station, and the song "Praise You in the Storm" was playing. It is one of my favorites. But today, for some reason, one line struck me and I haven't been able to get it out of my mind. It says, "Every tear I've cried, you hold in your hand." What an amazing image of our loving, compassionate, and caring Father. Picturing His strong hands holding my tears almost brings me to tears....

Isn't it comforting to know that the God of the universe loves us enough to hold our tears in his hands??

9 Months

Dear Drew,

What a fun month it has been!!! I can barely wrap my mind around all the things you are doing now. As always, it has gone WAY too fast and you are getting to be too big too fast for your mommy. But I know that is part of this motherhood gig, and I just have to get used to it.

Your army crawl has turned into a real crawl and you are really on the move. I can't take my eyes off of you for a second. You are also pulling up now - on EVERYTHING! Your favorite spot is the entertainment center. You are just like your daddy - you love the electronics! Your two top teeth have come in so you are now sporting a 4 tooth grin. I love it! You have also learned to sign "all done" and even say it in your own little way.

You've grown out of all kinds of things - your bouncy seat, your car carrier, your activity gym.... It amazes me the rate at which I am moving things down to the basement to put away for the "next baby" - a LONG way down the road, I might add! It makes me sad to put it all up, but at the same time it is so exciting to watch you explore the world around you and learn new things every day.

You also found out this month that you are going to have a new baby cousin in December. Your Aunt Amy is having another baby, and it will be so much fun to have another baby in the family. I hope you two will grow up to be very close! Your cousin Braden already adores you, so I'm pretty sure you two will always be big buds!

I can hardly believe that in just 3 short months we will be celebrating your first birthday. I will treasure these moments forever and I am so very grateful that I am your mommy. I couldn't ask for anything better in the world.

I love you baby boy!
Mommy

This.......

...is what I walked into after Drew's morning nap today. Think it might be time to lower the crib?? I'm gonna have my hands full!!!